Dear You

Dear You,

They say you should never meet your heroes

They'll only disappoint you

I've only known about you for a little over a month

But I admired you

Which only made what you really had to say about me that much harder to process

I was a captive audience for you the night before

You had my undivided attention

But I guess I should have known when you couldn't be bothered to get off of your phone

That you had no use for me, my words or my world

Dear You,

I feel like you blocked me because you were ashamed to tell me the truth

That you lacked the strength of your convictions

And only felt safe speaking your true feelings when you knew I'd never see them

Or maybe, you simply didn't care if I ever found out

Well, I did.  Friends of mine made it their place to be your messenger

I honestly wish they hadn't

But at least now I know the truth about you

Or at the very least, the truth about how you see me

Dear You,

I'm not afraid to tell you that I was in awe of you

It's one thing to see someone from afar, be somewhat familiar with their work

It's an entire other thing to sit in the same room approximately three feet apart from one another

You were even better than I imagined

I was completely enamored by you

All I wanted was for you to be a small part of my life

I've met many great people through poetry

I was hoping to add you to that list

To keep in contact and hope that some of your greatness might rub off on me

Or, at the very least, to be able have a nice chat every now and then

None of that will happen, now

You've made it clear that you want nothing to do with me

And I'm more than willing to oblige you

Dear You,

The night we first met, I had a few kind hours of beautiful thoughts

Exploring possibilities that, while unlikely, were nice to indulge in

I want to thank you for shattering those visions so decisively

Few have ever had your level of brutal mercy to that end

I want to hate you, but I can't.  I have no desire for it

Friends say that they hope you're not as single-dimensional as I have cause to believe

But I've coaxed this level of disgust out of others before

You needed no such coaxing

I finally know the truth about you, how you operate, how you deal with others

My heart will eventually mend, but I fear yours will remain as poisoned as the day we met